Interpersona 2(1) Articles
Couples’ Helpful, Unhelpful and Ideal Conflict Resolution Strategies: Secure and Insecure Attachment Differences and Similarities

Abstract
Twenty two heterosexual couples living in New Zealand participated in this study regarding helpful, unhelpful and idealized conflict resolution strategies. Thematic analysis was used to extract key themes, and these were categorized by whether individuals were securely or insecurely attached to their partners. Both secure and insecure individuals identified similar helpful conflict strategies, including turn-taking, listening and remaining calm. Differences emerged between secure and insecure individuals with regards to unhelpful strategies, with insecure individuals’ descriptions taking on an overall negative slant, whilst secure individuals either did not use unhelpful strategies or have learned more helpful strategies over time. Similar ideal conflict strategies emerged for both secure and insecure individuals; however, secure individuals’ descriptions were much more closely matched to the helpful strategies they use in their own relationships.

Keywords: secure attachment; insecure attachment; conflict resolution

Author note:
This research was based on the first author’s doctoral dissertation at Massey University, New Zealand in partial fulfillment of the requirements for a doctoral degree - made possible by a Massey Doctoral Scholarship. Correspondence should be addressed to Dr. Dave Clarke, Department of Psychology, Massey University, Private Bag 102 904, NSMSC, Auckland, New Zealand; e-mail: d.clarke@massey.ac.nz

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